........ Just like the familiar movie scene where everybody else takes one step back and the dummy left standing out in front has volunteered for the job, that's how i managed the position of Mn. Torch travel reporter or whatever it is. I didn't have to pass any test for the position, so that worked out nicely, because i'm a butcher of proper english and grammer laws, and if your easily offended by that type of reporting, you might want to stop reading this now

........ OK, everything starts somewhere and ends somewhere else i believe is a Newton Law, although i was once docked double points for answering "Newton who" to a question regarding Newton's Law on a high school science quiz. That's enough of my character development for this review, now as for the others involved in the Mn. passing of the torch, that's going to take some time to "cipher" as Jethro from the Beverly Hillbilly's would say.

........ Sometimes the truth just doesn't make sense, and is even less colorful, so i'm not going to worry about that much. From the top of the MN hierarchy the word came down that all good Mn. residents would want to take part and help as they could in the various factions for the upcoming 2006 Equinics. The torch relay as well as the assembling of the Mn team runners was to be through a volunteer system, and then there's monitoring the health of the team throughout the final weeks before the big event. That all looked good on paper, but here in the real world there wasn't enough time to go around and the 'sign up' sheets on the Mn. message boards were to use an old phrase "emptier than heaven on a saturday night", so emergency plans were needed. From the new Mn. headquarters in Toronto , Canada , which was just recently relocated from Sydney, Australia, and before that it was Woodlyne New Jersey and before that .... what was i talking about, oh yea in Toronto, Canada, Minnesota's new leader, Theo, was being put to his first big managerial test.

........... "Who's gonna do this who's gonna do that ", Theo mockingly said to himself as he thought of the Equinics logistics from his Toronto office. He'd been on a video conference schedule that seemed cruel. Now Johnno (the very well respected Mn. leader known as the man who resurrected Mn. from the Jersey ashes) calls from his Mn. headquarters in Sydney, AUS , 4 AM Toronto time and wants to know who's picking up the Torch etc. and letting Theo know the word on the "main game" message board was that Mn. was dropping the ball. "Do I have to round up Rharfo from N.Z. and Deyoto and fly half-way around the world just to get the job done" Johnno jabbed, between swigs of dark Ale, at Theo. Johnno has a degree in motivation, and he isn't one to pull punches. Theo thought for a second and then answered," are you saying you'll do it Johnno 'cause then i can get back to bed and have 'no worries mate'." Johnno quickly came back with "yea i'll just call up Liddleski from England and Thepict from Scotland and we'll all meet in Utah or wherever the hell it was the Torch was waiting already for Mn. to pick up," then Johnno's voice intesified, "listen Theo you need to get those US slugs off their over weight arses and as those hillbillies over there say 'get'r done'. " "Ok, Johnno, I know you're worried about the Mn. image, and so am I and so is Dennis and those other fat butts you are thinking of, let me get Dennis on the phone in a few hours and see what he's got, I'll get back to you in the middle of your night with some answers," Theo said, and then it was back to bed he stumbled.

....... Dennis, also known as Supertoy7 or SuperD as i like to call him had been on the phone most of the day before from his New Jersey office already trying to drum up some volunteers, and was back at early the next day. SuperD knows the residency the best i'd guess since he was the founder of Mn. many years back, and he also is a well respected racing member throughout the many residencies and their founders . SuperD has help he can lean on from his New Jersey office. He could call Dundey in from the Jersey swamps, and in about the same amount of time it would take Dundey to show up, Desperado, in from Delaware (i think it's all one city now), and Chuckrock from NYC could also appear, along with Rich from N.Y., at least that was where he was last seen picking up mounts from the MJG faithful. Now that's a five headed monster that can get the job done, but the trouble was Mn. needed help in the N.W. USA. and the Mn. residents from the east coast weren't feeling up to a road trip. Each resident Dennis spoke with gave the same answer, " Call Logan, he's not doing anything." That's when my phone rang, i'm Randall Logan (Randy, rcdlogan, Rman) our my other aliases, "Hey SuperD, can you believe i answered the phone in spite of caller ID", as i started the banter that i knew was coming. "Listen Rman, i need , i mean Mn. needs, "you can say that again" i interrupted," i should say all of the Equinic's are depending on your help, and i know your the man for the job and do you want to know how i know ?" SuperD said as he raised his voice to a crescendo hoping to keep me at bay. "Uh no i don't want to know " i answered knowing i was about to find out anyway. "Because the Torch is in Logan, Utah, now there's no denying that's an omen," SuperD stated with dramatic conviction. "I'll tell you what there's no denying, and that's that you may well have an omen, but i'm an ol' man," i said trying not to laugh at my own weak pun. "Very funny Rman, so when are you leaving," SuperD said hoping to close with the hard sell . "I can't just up and go to Utah, even if it is Logan Utah," i pleaded. "How about i call JKJ stables, they are established west of me." i asked , "already called , they're picking up and moving all the Mn. Equinics runners shipping in from overseas, i, i mean we can't expect more than that now can we, i need you to," "You're breaking up SuperD, hshshshsh, i'm losing my connection , hshshshhsh , i'll have to get back to you hhshhshs," and saying that i hung up before Dennis could say anymore. I needed to buy some time for this one, as i turned off my cell phone and hit the stairs to the basement where i sat down to play some video games in between stable updates.

......... Several hours later SuperD was still sitting there in Jersey shaking his head while staring through the flashing light on his screen map that was the transmitter attached to the Torch in Logan Utah. While wondering what he would say to Theo he suddenly realized the Torch was moving. For a second he thought Logan must have flown to Utah to get the torch, then he thought, Not. So Dennis picked up the red phone that automatically connected him with Theo's private cell and the first thing he hears is the sound track from a loud bar scene and then finally he painfully hears Theo yelling above the roar, "Hey Dennis, wish you were here man, we're really starting to P-A-R-T-Y, why don't you and your east coast cohorts drive on up and celebrate with us. Bigrick's here from the Ontario track and Citation has driven up from Hawthorn Race Course to try and work up the future Mn. gold medal winning Equinics team, 'c'mon we need you - "Theo is then startled by Dennis's " I thought you'd be worrying about the relaying of the Torch, haven't the Equinic's committee members been grilling you" SuperD accidentally yelled into his powerful red phone. Theo stepped into the men's room to cut down the noise and replied, " yea i was worried but then I got tired of worrying and listening to all the doubters and pulled the oldest trick in the book, you know, the ask the rookie to do the dirty work, the old seniority rules, pulling rank-" SuperD then had to interrupt, "So you know the Torch is moving, you took care of the problem, way to -" Theo's turn to butt in only he once again screams, "What did you say, the Torch is moving, that can't be," Dennis wincing in pain holds the phone way out at arms length and while yelling, "please stop yelling," he hears Theo say, "i'll call you back from my office," and then click. SuperD guessed Theo's party was over for now.

......... Timing is everything, but i guess that can work either way for you, and for me it was just strange, ever since pretending to lose signal and then cutting off SuperD i'd been working on a plan to move the Torch. I'd called Silverny down in Louisville, Ky. to see if it would be safe for the Torch to be shipped to they're stables and they agreed as long as they didn't have to be there and sign for anything. What better place could there possibly be for Mn. to leave the Torch, in the shadows of the Twin Spires, ah that Blugrass is so fine, so it was settled in my mind, all i had to do was to call Theo and Dennis and let them know that i'd set a plan in motion. My plan was to build a special metal box with holes in it that would allow a Torch to burn while it was being held upright by the special arms inside the box that always made sure the flame was pointing up while being shipped in a truck to the Downs in Louisville, Ky.

.......... I called SuperD first because i know he has connections with a major shipping company, and this is where that 'Timing' stuff kicks in so, when he answered i started talking fast, "i've solved our moving of the Torch problem, i'm gonna build a special box to ship the Torch to Silverny, this box i'm designing won't let the Torch -" Dennis quickly cut me off saying, "what are you talking about, designing, going to build a box, you're too much, it so happens the Torch is already on the move from Logan Utah Mr. Logan and now I know as I expected your not the one that's moving it " "Oh," i mumbled, "What was that Rman, speak up," D was taunting me now, "let me put you on speaker phone so Chuck, Rob, Rich , Dundey and I can all hear about the special box." The 5 headed monster was in the same Jersey office and the tone of SuperD's voice told me something was wrong. "Does Theo know the Torch is moving?" i stupidly asked and then heard the 5 part harmony laughing. "Does Theo know", i recognized Dundey's mocking and then more laughter. SuperD then spoke up, "Theo just hung up from telling us how he had pulled seniority on a couple of our newest members Mig and Bangsy, who graciously accepted their assignments to move the Torch, and since Mig was closest to the Torch , Mig had agreed to pick it up in Utah and drive it to Cheyenne, Wy. where Bangsy will meet the Torch and then drive it to The Cathedral Of The Plains just outside Victoria, Kansas where it was to be transferred to the Great Plains Residency." "Oh, so Mig has the Torch," i said with relief, and then i hear more laughing from Jersey group. This time it's Rich informing me that, "Theo said the Torch started moving long before Mig could have ever have reached it ," the silence was deafening, and once again i make the mistake of saying something, " do the other Equinics members know the Torch is moving, of course they do i continued that satellite thingy," as i answered my own question SuperD began talking and i faded, "we assume that they assume that we are moving the Torch, and we did receive a call asking why the Torch was moving north instead of south and west to Kansas, and we informed the committee we are moving it to the north to take a safer route." Then i had to ask, "so they they assumed that we assumed a safer route to the north with the Torch -" SuperD cut me off saying, "Ok, we know were in trouble, but Mig is heading south towards the Torch from the north , and we are hoping to intercept it," I couldn't help repeating ,"intercept it?," then the line went dead ....

........ Not even 10 seconds later every Mn. resident around the globe got a call at the same time, and heard the same recorded message across all the time zones of the world, "somewhere it's midnight, do you know where your Equinics Torch is?" Of course there was no way to know, but i'm pretty certain that all around the earth at nearly the same instant the Mn. nation sang, " SCOOBI SCOOBIDOO WHERE ARE YOU!" Theo in spite of still lifting his jaw off his chest had already hit the Scoobi speed dial and before it even rang Scoobi answered," I was thinking you might call about now boss," Before he could say another word Theo was pummeling him with questions, "What's going on?, Where are you?, How the heck did you call all the lines at once?," "Easy capt. T. , me and Torch E happen to be headed north on Rt. 15 looking to 'intercept' Mig who's flying east on Rt. 90, we ought to be right on schedule to collide just west of Butte Mt., unless the troopers run down Mig who seems on my screen to be doin' about 110 mph, better give a call and tell Mig to relax the lead foot boss." "Why, "was the only word out of Theo's mouth before Scoob started up again. " I know it's a bit unorthodox, but being Scoob from, USA, i felt the need to be Superscoobi for my fellow country mates and therefore i tapped everybody's phone and i've been monitoring all your calls from my laptop for weeks now." Theo started up again, "So that's how you knew where Mig was and the Torch and that's how -" Scuba jumped in again, "That's how i'm saving all your, as Johnno put it to you 'overweight arses'," "So you've heard everything," Theo said nearly wincing on the 'everything'. "Yea, but i got a short memory and i don't take anything personal when it comes to business, now the rest of you over partied bumbling idiots get back to work on picking and getting the teams runners in shape, and leave the Torch travel to Mig and Bangsy and myself." Then Scoobi hung up and with a big cat grin headed on up the road to meet Mig. That's all i've heard up to now, but i'm assuming the Mn. rookies and Scoobi got the E. Torch to Kansas, so Dorothy can stop clicking her heels and head on down the road to the next stop.