The Equinic Diary Of New South Wales             /tr> DAY 1:  Equinics Torch lands in Australia By Railrider Here I was, sitting in Cairns airport with the Skunk at 9:00am.  I was wondering why on earth we had to come to Cairns in 35 degree heat to meet up with Tijay and Joe2000 from Germany for the Torch handover.  I'd never met these guys before but from what the stereotypical view of Germans is down here in Australia I wasn't expecting too much.  But when these 2 guys came up in Hawaiian shirts and said "Guten Tag, I am Tijay, and this is Joe.  Vu must be Vailrider." I got a bit of a shock.  Tijay was about 6'6" and build like a brick s*%$house, while Joe was about 2 inches taller with a similar build. Joe at the airport computer check-in "Yeah mate, and this is Skunk."  I said craning my neck to the heavens from my suddenly minuscule 5'9" frame. "How about ve go have a vittle drink before ve go back  on the plane?" said Joe. "Sure thing, one of our residents Dkyoung owns a pub down the road called DKY.  He's got Beck's on tap." I said.  I kept staring at Joe, I'm sure he was in that porno Bangsy brought around the other night. What they didn't tell us was that their plane didn't leave until 8:00 tonight.  So, after 10 hours of hardcore drinking (and boy can those germans drink), a lot of discussion about our Equinics hopefuls and a lot of discussion about how great Mike is, we took them back to the airport. Skunk turned to me as the plane took off "So how many hours does it take to get Perth mate?" "About 36 mate." I said looking at my watch.  "Holy crap, we have to be there in 18 hours for the races at Ascot!!!" So we jumped in my Peugeot and headed off in a cloud of dust to cross the Red Centre with a quick stopover at Alice Springs and Ayer's Rock.   Day 2: The races at Ascot We rolled into the carpark right at midday when we were due to arrive.  Skunk was hanging out the window waving the torch.  A small group of people were there to meet us including Southafric, Angellic2 and Devineequi.  "Where's Bobniak, I thought he was supposed to be here?" I said. "He's in the at the bar." replied Southafric. "Well what are we standing out here for, lets go!!!" I replied. So we sat in the bar for a few races drinking.  Bobniak studied the torch and worked out how to detach the base from the flame and use it as a yardglass.  Suffice to say by the time the feature race for the day came around most of us were struggling to walk.  Southafric was vigourously defending the South African cricket team saying how they would thrash the Aussies.  Angellic2 was arguing the Aussies case by saying the South Africans were a racist bunch of match-fixers, even if they could beat us at cricket.  Meanwhile the rest of us were discussing whether Jo Ann Christmas, Cecil Roo and The Pretender would win and also discussing how far Slickfest would win by. The feature race was the Equinics Stakes which was won convincingly by Corporate Bruce.  After I made my rather slurred speech at the presentation we went back to the bar for a few more golden ales.  When I was at the bar getting my shout I bumped into Fred Kersley.  I asked him how Northerly was and he asked me how Slickfest would go in the Equinics.  He also told me to tell Mike he wanted to see a Western Australian track in the Sim, so if you're reading this Mike.... Northerly winning the Cox Plate Slickfest winning at NSW, note the similarities Once the races were over I left the others in the bar and took the reassembled torch and headed off to Adelaide across the Nullarbor Plain   Day 3:  Adelaide and Melbourne I got to Cheltenham racecourse in Adelaide just in time for the first race.  I went to the betting ring and backed the first winner before looking for the group who were meant to meet there.  They're late the bastards I thought to myself.  So I decided to mingle amongst the crowd.  Tony McEvoy came up and said hello to me and wished me luck with my horses.  After I backed the winner in the 2nd race the others finally decided to show up. "Sorry mate, we thought the races were at Morphettville today."  explained Manager who was accompanied by Wagkombi and Slammin. "That's OK, you're here now.  And here hold this, it's bloody heavy." and I thrust the Torch into his hand and went off to collect my winnings. So we sat around the bar talking up the chances of Shan's Bird, Fast Debit, Capper and Slickfest in the Equinics and also talked about all the champion gallopers to come out South Australia in recent years who are pictured below.         The feature race, the Equinics Trophy, was the 4th race on the card and was won by Innovation Girl who came over from Melbourne.  After we made the presentation I said my goodbyes and headed off to Melbourne where I was to present the Torch at a Moonee Valley night meeting. I was welcomed at the gates by a group of NSW trainers which included Bangsy, Manapace, Shayelk and Toplight.  Each took turns to carry the Torch.  Bangsy went off to try and pick up a few chicks with it.  Manapace opened the Torch up to try and figure out how the hell they could keep the flame burning for so long.  Shayelk went around the enclosure with it trying to join up some more residents to the Australian Trainers Championship.  Toplight took it to the stable area to rub it against Cecil Roo, Too Much Ground and Mango Tootsie for luck. Bart Cummings lighting the Equinics Cauldron at Moonee Valley They all joined me on the dais to present the cup to the winner of the Equinics Cup, Intelligent Star, and to show off the Equinics Torch.  Afterwards we went to the bar where the celebrities were everywhere.  Clarry Connors was there telling me how many races Viking Ruler would win this preparation and how far Slickfest would win by.  Bart Cummings came up to me and tried to buy me a Toohey's New.  David Hall also came over to tell me how many winners he was planning to have this Spring Carnival. After Jimmy Barnes belted out some throat-crushers after the last race we headed into town to have a few drinks and then I headed off to catch the Devonport ferry and meet up with Shags for the Tasmanian leg of the Torch's journey. Jimmy Barnes By Railrider THE EQUINICS TORCH TRIP THROUGH AUSTRALIA                                                       Day 4-5 Tasmania The Apple Isle        Tasmania Ahhhhhh Tasmania , what can u say about Tasmania , Some people say they have two heads ? , some people say they are one big family , some people say they know alot about Growing Marijuana but one thing that is true the Tasmanian Devil Does exist here and it doesn't Spin through trees and eat everything :) . Taz-Devil ( Famous NSW resident Trainer ) Lives here, Shagger ( NSW Resident ) Lives here both having there stars representing NSW in the Equinics, As the torch arrives in the north part of the state the Tasmanian " HIPE " is surprisingly strong with a outstanding 68 people watching the torch arrive off the boat, as a chanting began almost immediately  " GOOOOOOOOOOO NSW GOOOOOOOOO  !!!!! "  and it was surprising  how much noise 68 people can make , clapping and cheering , one old timer was even over heard saying  " what's this mob all about ? "  " Its the Equinics Torch " and spectator yell out !!!!  "Equinics who ????? " he said  As the Torch and the Massive 8 truck Convoy made it down the east coast spotting some sensational ocean views , spectacular beaches and some mighty fine Tasmania Brewed Beer the convoy arrived in Hobart ( Town of the Taz-Devil ) only a couple hours late after spending a fair few hours at the local Triabunna pub playing in a local 8 ball Calcutta. After great debate and convincing from Taz-Devil the crew ( and torch )  decided to  crash at the Casino for the night playing the pokies, Black Jack tables and dancing the night away to some 70's Cover Band ACDC, eventually ending up at the Men's Gallery in the early hours of the morning getting some special attention from some quiet friendly ladies.  Day 5 Dawned on us and the Equinics Crew + Torch rose to the Glistering sun shining on the River Derwent over the Capital of Tasmania , Hobart . The Crew Pack there bags and off they went again, The  Parade through the city was a success aprox 107 people turned up this time and the local Favorites got a roaring send off as they Flew out of Hobart on the Journey back to Melbourne. When the Torch arrived back in Melbourne, They decide to go grab some good ol Aussie Tucker from the " One stop Aussie Pie Shop " down on Collins street, it has the worlds Most famous Kangaroo and Wallaby Pies, " Hmmmm Yuuummm  just what you need after a hangover !!! ,While the crew were in the Shop Picking out and buying these famous Pies, your would not have guessed it but something TRAGIC has happened . Richard Head the Driver of the Main vehicle which the Equinics Torch is kept in gets held up !!!  Yes held up and Richard gets Robbed !!! , lost everything , His wallet, money , clothes , valuables and guess what " The Torch !!!!!!!  "  Yes " The Equinics Torch got stolen "  Richard Flies in to the Shop " SOOOOON OF A .............    B*$@%H "   " THE TORCH IS GONNNNE !!!!!!! "  screaming out standing in the middle of the One stop pie shop but nothing but his Birthday suit on  "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  What do we do Now  !!!!!!! "  Well the state goes on Alert , the city goes into depression and The Famous Equinics is in Danger , you cant have a Equinics without the torch , its like having a Pie without the sauce !!!  Finally the Torch is recovered, a guy was selling the torch at a flea market  on the outer suburbs of Melbourne for $7.60 Australian , the guy was arrested and finally the torch was given back to its rightful parties and they continue onto NSW .......... btw Richard head acted up to him name and was sacked from the Equinics touring party and sent back to his home somewhere in back in Afghanistan .    Day 6  New South Wales        Home of the Opera house, the famous Sydney Harbor bridge , the outraging Bushfires that tragically shocked the world just recently , home of a average Football team ( Go Hawthorn ) and a classy Cricket team , a picturesque City that some say one of the prettiest in the world , Home for our Residents ,Were one of the most popular Trainer championships is run were players from all over the world come and compete,  were Famous Rosehill Gardens racecourse is situated, Sydney is just a Magnificent place to visit  The Equinics Torch ventured through the City, thousands and thousands of people come to visit, see, clap and cheer the torch, this Famous torch that 24 hours ago had been stolen by a thug , sold to a kids ,next door neighbors  wife , husbands dog, nephews girlfriends uncle that new someone down the street that sold it to a guy that went fishing down at the Yarra and ended up at a local Market that sold for $7.60 . The day ended with the National Anthem sung in harmony by local Residents Bangsy ,DKYoung and Wagkombi all looking like the three tenors with a special high pitched glass shattering verse of God saved the queen sang by Skunk :)  ending in a Massive eye-opening fireworks display ,, absolutely outstanding !!!  what a trip it has been  as the torch gets passed over to the residents of Queensland .   From all of us at New South Wales Goodluck and seeyou at the Equinics Party !!!!!! :)   By Shagger